Peanut Butter Sandwiches by Klemmer

Leaders operate from being responsible, even when they don't feel like it and it doesn't seem true

A construction worker went to work every day with his black metal lunch pail under his arm. On Monday, he complained loudly about the peanut butter and jelly sandwich he had for lunch. His co-workers ignored his complaints, since it was his first day on the job.

Tuesday at lunch this same worker was even louder about how much he hated peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. There were a few rumblings from his co-workers, but they let it slide.

By Friday, after hearing him complain every day about PBJ sandwiches one of his co-workers yelled out, "Why don't you just get your wife to make you a tuna fish or Philly cheese steak sandwich or something else?"

The man looked up with a puzzled look on his face and said, "My wife? I don't have a wife. I made this myself."

What if the state of your business, your personal relationships, and your health were all simply a sandwich you made yourself? Leaders take the viewpoint that their choices create their experience, whether that is true or not.

I submit that for most people, they are living a life of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich of their own creation. Of course, it doesn't look that way to them. That's because the decisions that are creating their life are unconscious decisions instead of conscious ones.

It's what you don't know that trips you up or prevents you from producing the life you say you want. When was the last time you explored what unconscious decisions were affecting your life?

What have you bought into as reality–such as what success really means–that is merely an unconscious decision? Is there a success you are currently enjoying you think is just a coincidence or a matter of chance or lucky timing?

Explore the choices you made in setting any and all of that up. If you don't see how you create your success you will always be afraid of losing it because you won't know how to recreate it. Take one hour this week and invest it in exploring what unconscious decisions are affecting your life.

TAKEAWAY! It is what you don't know that is stopping you. Every result in your life is a peanut butter sandwich you made for yourself.

Action Step #1

Write down one result you have in your life currently that you do not like (the size of your bank balance, the state of a relationship, the condition of your car, etc.).

Now, write down at least 10 choices you've made that set up that result; 10 thoughts, feelings, speaking or actions, which allowed that result to happen or flat out caused that result. Don't quit until you have all 10.

Now, do this same exercise with one successful result you are enjoying today.

If you don't see how you are making the great things happen you will not be able to recreate them.

Pretend your choices were at cause even if you don't believe it or feel that it isn't true.

Action Step #2

Do a seminar or hire a coach where you explore what decisions you have made about you that are unconscious. This is what our Personal Mastery seminar does or what a good coach can create for you.

An Example  An advanced graduate of ours (Curt) relayed a story that illustrated a peanut butter sandwich he made for himself. Curt was struggling along with mediocre success when he took our seminars. One of his insights was that during his attendance at the Air Force Academy, his flight team had been climbing a tower in a training exercise. One girl on his team slipped and fell–from 60 feet high! Although she didn't die, it was a traumatic incident that stayed with Curt. For years, Curt told me, he blamed the Air Force for accepting this woman into the Academy when it was obvious she lacked the standard physical requirements. He was holding that against them and he was holding that against himself as well. What he did not see until our seminars was that although everyone saw him as a leader, Curt did not trust himself. Curt had decided out of that incident that he couldn't trust himself. Until he saw that he just thought others believed in him falsely. What he did not know about his unconscious thinking was repeatedly holding him back from productively assuming a leadership role in anything, let alone his business.

"One's philosophy is not best expressed in words; it is expressed in the choices one makes . . . and the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility."–Eleanor Roosevelt