David and Goliath by Klemmer

Leaders welcome resistance

Nothing great becomes great without overcoming great resistance. Christianity did not become great during the time of Christ. It became great when the Christians had to overcome persecution and being eaten by the lions. The Jewish faith was the same. Any country is the same. Any organization is the same. So is a person.

Overcoming resistance is how people and their organizations become what they need to become in order to be great. The only way you get muscles is by lifting weights. Resistance is simply the weights.

That's a very different perspective on resistance than the average person has. The average person doesn't want any resistance in his or her life. They resist resistance.

Did you ever hear, "What you resist persists?"

Your resistance to an outside resistance makes the problem worse. Most people have a deep-seated belief they must resist in order to maintain control, but that always backfires.

So what resistance are you experiencing in your life? Can you get excited about that as the very thing you need to build your muscles for greatness?

It's the story of David and Goliath. Goliath was the best thing to happen to David. Without overcoming Goliath, David could not have become King. No one would have known about him. He would not have developed certain attributes that allowed him later to rule the kingdom.

Most people want to be kings and queens, but they never want to have to fight a Goliath.

Maybe the resistance you are experiencing is an economic downturn. Perhaps it is a spouse not supportive of the work you do. Maybe it is some employees who are resisting a new direction you are taking your department or the whole company. Perhaps you're in sales and prospects are resisting your price. Maybe you have children who resist you.

Non-resistance on your part to outside resistance does not mean you throw your hands up in resignation. It is an acknowledgment of how things are, which frees you up to have an effective response.

There are two kinds of resistance: external and your own internal resistance. I'm speaking here of a leader's ability to embrace outside resistance as a positive step in growth. Re-frame external resistance as simply part of the necessary steps you're taking in becoming great.

TAKEAWAY! If you want an extra-ordinary life, then you must face extra-ordinary resistance. Welcome resistance instead of resisting it or looking to minimize the amount of resistance you face.

Action Step #1

What was the last major resistance you faced or are facing? What was the lesson you learned that made you stronger?

Place a stone (like the one David used in his sling to slay Goliath) on your desk where you work to remind yourself that resistance is good!

Action Step #2

Read a story this week on someone who has overcome resistance. Some suggested biographies are Abraham Lincoln, Helen Keller, or Winston Churchill. Write down three things they did that you can also do.

An Example

I come from a background where everyone in my family went to college. It was expected. My wife's family is very successful, but no one graduated from college so they didn't have the same value.

Our oldest son resisted school. He flat out didn't like it and for years I resisted that. The result was that our relationship wasn't very good. I was trying to change him instead of work with what I had.

I thought there was something wrong with him and the situation. I finally stopped resisting. It wasn't working. I asked myself, "What could I do and where could I take this situation that would be good?" I started by simply listening to him. Then, I was honest with my own fears.

The first good thing that came out of it was a great relationship with my son. Then, it became an exploration of what he could do without a college education.

Interestingly enough, one of the turns the journey took was that he entered college and graduated from San Francisco State at the age of 24. He worked for me for a while, which never would have happened before, and then he went on to pursue his career.

My overcoming my resistance not only made me a better parent with my other children, but a better CEO of our company.

Life is not so threatening when what used to be a threat is now a friend.

"One man with courage makes a majority"–Andrew Jackson